


Cookies & Hot Chocolate

by masaringo



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-12 06:29:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5655994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/masaringo/pseuds/masaringo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jongdae just wanted to spend Christmas with his boyfriend Joonmyeon. Sadly, things hardy go as planned. <br/>This is actually a PG-15, for use of alcohol and mentions of sex. You've been warned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cookies & Hot Chocolate

Sweet vanilla and spicy ginger scent. Jongdae had never thought he'd enjoy being in the coziness of Joonmyeon's kitchen the whole evening so much. The heat of the oven had finally dragged the winter's cold out of his bones, and now, as he whisked yet  _another_ batch of eggs, he was growing progressively hotter. Pausing for a moment, he took in his boyfriend's delighted expression, as he carefully pressed one cookie cutter after the other over what seemed to be their tenth batch of cookie dough.

"Hey," Joonmyeon looked up at him, looking frankly adorable with his Christmas apron and disheveled hair, "Who are we gonna give all this cookies to?"

"Well. Half for us and half for whoever you want, I guess."

"Then half for me!"

"If you keep on eating like this you'll get fat," Joonmyeon teased.

"Why would you _say_ that?" Jongdae gasped, bringing a hand up to his mouth in mock shock, "You better watch your mouth if you don't want me to go out and find a new boyfriend to share my cookies with," he finished with a pout.

Joonmyeon rolled his eyes, chuckling under his breath, "You know I'm kidding. You look perfect Pikachu."

"Don't call me that," Jongdae muttered halfheartedly, cheeks coloring up at the compliment. Okay, he hadn't been a fan of the pet name at the beginning, even less when it had accidentally came up around his friends, but now he couldn't deny the fuzzy feeling he got every time his boyfriend called him like that. Jongdae was _so_ gone, "Yeah I do know. I'll just give them to Yeol and Baek and call it an apology for missing their beloved party."

His friend's annual Christmas party had always been a Big Deal. Every single one of their friends (and also not-that-friends, because why not) were invited. 'The event of the year', as Chanyeol liked to call it. Well, not for Jongdae. At least not this year. It wasn't as if he didn't like the whole 'alcohol, fun and candy' theme it had going on, but he had Joonmyeon this year, and was quite excited to be able to welcome Christmas cuddled by the fireplace with his beloved. So cliché and domestic. 

Joonmyeon's expression shifted to one of uneasiness in a beat, and he went back to cutting the cookies before speaking up, "You know I'd be okay with you going, right?"

"Yep. But I'd rather spend tonight with you. After all, you're my boyfriend," he grinned.

"You _really_ love the b word," Joonmyeon commented with an uncomfortable chuckle as he stopped himself from rubbing his neck with his floured hand.

"What word? _Boyfriend?_ " Jongdae enunciated obnoxiously around a smile, "Of course I do! Specially for you. I didn't spend so many months trying to woo you and being systematically turned down not to make the best use of it now that I can," he turned to look back at Joonmyeon when he was met with silence, "Why? Don't you like it?"

"Sure I do Jongdae. I just find it weird how much you seem to like it," he attempted an uncomfortable smile.

Jongdae set the bowl down, shortening the distance between them, and beamed shyly.

"I like you Joon. A lot. I really hope you... feel the same?"

"I do! Really!" at last he put the cutter down, abandoning his task completely and facing his boyfriend.

"Good," Jongdae smiled softly, taking a step forward until there was a mere inch between their bodies, "Then... Can I... kiss you?" he asked hopefully, staring right into his eyes. Which was why he saw the exact moment Joonmyeon panicked, turning beet red as he hurriedly took a step backwards. 

"This bach is ready for the oven, I think. We should do that now!" he babbled as he hurriedly set the cookies in the pan. 

Jongdae smirked around the lump in his throat, doing his best to brush it off and not feel hurt. He just had to be patient. It was always the same, though. They had been going out for almost three months, been close friends for more than a year. And still Joonmyeon would turn away from anything even remotely physical. The farthest they'd gotten to had been holding hands for not even a full minute, and that only after Jongdae's stubborn insistence. That's why he couldn't help but to wonder whether Joonmyeon really liked him, even half as much as he did, or he just didn't want to reject him and hurt his feelings. After all, it had been Jongdae who'd been trying to get Joonmyeon to even look at him since they'd known each other, pestered him to go on a date. He'd do anything to get a reaction out of his boyfriend. He loved him, he truly did. That's why he wanted to kiss him, to touch him. He just didn't get what the big deal was.

 

  
They finished baking the cookies quickly, Joonmyeon hurriedly cleaning the mess they'd made as Jongdae prepared his famous hot chocolate. Well, it'd be famous once he'd learn how to make it properly, that's it. 

Taking their treats with them, the couple proceeded to place everything in the little coffee table by the huge sofa in Joonmyeon's living room, arranging themselves on it. 

Sip by sip, Jongdae let the hot chocolate melt away his previous worries. He considered it no less than a miracle that his boyfriend's parents had left town for the holiday, leaving the house to his only son and, unawarely, to him. It wasn't often they had the chance to be completely on their own. Munching on an unexpectedly tasty cookie, Jongdae tuned out Joonmyeon's blabbering about college, letting his voice wash over him. Carefully, as to not scare the boy away, he leaned into his shoulder, holding his breath and bracing himself for the more than possible rejection. When it didn't come, he had to hold back the urge to wrap himself around Joonmyeon. Although, he did have to admit this wasn't an opportunity that came around often. It seemed perfect. His boyfriend was just there, still talking about one thing or another but Jongdae could just focus on his _lips_. Warm and pink. Probably tasting like chocolate. It was now or never. 

He left his place by Joonmyeon's shoulder, shifting until he was fully facing him. Joonmyeon stopped talking, staring at him inquiringly as Jongdae moved closer. He was so close. He could feel Joonmyeon's breath on his lips, warm and sweet and so _close_. Just a split second before their lips made contact did Joonmyeon seem to understand what exactly was about to happen, turning his face so that Jongdae's lips made contact with the flushed surface of his cheek. Which, Jongdae had to admit, wasn't the worst thing that could have happened, being the most intimate contact they'd ever had, but it wasn't what he was aiming to. 

Pushing himself off a completely scarlet Joonmyeon, he stared at him sadly, frustration building up in his chest. 

"Why won't you let me kiss you?" He asked, sounding harsher than he wanted to, but unable to control it. 

"Emm. What? Y-You just did?" 

"You know that's not what I mean!" he snapped, "I mean a real kiss! On the lips and everything! A kiss like-" he swallowed, eyes stinging, and lowered his voice, "A kiss like you mean it. Like you want it too."

Jongdae looked back at Joonmyeon, searching for something, anything to show him that his boyfriend actually cared, that he did, even a little bit, want to kiss him back. Joonmyeon looked down, moving away minutely. 

And that was it. Jongdae couldn't take it anymore. He'd been blind, oh so blind. He really did love Joonmyeon. But apparently the feeling wasn't mutual. With the last bit of composure he had left, he got up of the couch, startling a pensive Joonmyeon. 

"Dae?"

"I'm going," Jongdae stated, a sharp edge to his tone. 

"What?! Where?"

"To Chanyeol and Baekhyun's. Maybe there I can get a kiss without having to beg for it!"

Joonmyeon gaped at him, thrown off, gaining enough consciousness to scramble to get the covers off him and running towards where Jongdae was grabbing his jacket, fumbling momentarily for his phone and keys before turning to the door. 

"Wait! What are you talking about?" Was the last thing he heard as he closed the door behind him. 

Jongdae ran to the bus stop, absolutely _refusing_ to let himself succumb under the temptation of going home and crying as he felt like doing now. Instead, he forced himself to steady his breath before pulling out his phone and calling Chanyeol. 

"Yeol! I hope there is still some room in your house," he said as soon as the line connected. 

"Pikadae! What? Is Korea's boyfriend coming? Oh oh is Joon coming too?" His friend slurred, clearly a couple too many shots in, heavy bass sounding in the background. 

"Nah, just me tonight," Jongdae replied, promptly ignoring the tightening on his chest and hoping his friend was drunk enough not to pick up on it. 

"Then hurry up Pikadae! Hey Baek-"

  
The line went dead as Jongdae watched the bus near him. Turning his phone off in hopes of forgetting about everything for a few hours, he snuggled further into his jacket, the icy night seeping trough, making the pounding in his head even more painful.   
 

As he sat on the freezing bus, utterly empty as everyone was already with their loved ones for the night, Jongdae could only hope to be as drunk as Chanyeol as soon as possible. He absentmindedly rubbed his hands together in hopes to heat them up, belatedly remembering that he'd had his gloves on when he'd gotten to Joonmyeon's. He must've forgotten them there. He'd have to ask his boy-. His train of thought stopped short at the word. Boyfriend? Was Joonmyeon still his boyfriend? The thought alone hurt, and he didn't want to think about it. At least not now. 

He took his phone out, zooming in on the clock reading 22:38 before noticing the lost calls. Around fifteen, several messages between them. The last one had been almost twenty minutes ago, and a part of him couldn't help but to bitterly question if that was what their relationship was worth for Joonmyeon, if he'd already given up. Why hadn't he kept trying?

With a sigh, he knocked on the door, mostly out of habit, as he seriously doubted anyone would hear over the ruckus that was most likely taking place inside the house. He was startled when Baekhyun himself yanked the door open, shrieking an embarrassingly high pitched "Jongdae!" as he pulled him into a hug, dragging him into the house without letting him utter a word. 

A beer was shoved his way, and he took a couple of sips as he was pulled thought the mass of bodies. He caught glimpses of classmates and a few of his other friends, all drinking and dancing, overall having a great time. He felt way more out of place than what he'd expected.

  
Jongdae only realized they'd stopped moving once Baekhyun let go of his arm, disappearing in the crowd. This was exactly what he'd wanted to avoid. It had been a blatant lie what he'd told Joonmyeon about going to the party to find someone to kiss. He'd never even think about it, even less now that he was with Joonmyeon. That's if they were still a thing. But anyway, he only wanted _his_  kisses, not random strangers'. He just needed to get out of the house, to scape the ugly feeling of not being wanted that had been threatening to crawl into him the whole evening. But now he regretted it. He regretted leaving without talking about their issues like adults, regretted having pushed Joonmyeon into something he apparently wasn't ready for, and, more than anything he regretted what he'd last told him. He really liked Joonmyeon, loved him even, and now that the heat of the moment had wore of the bare thought of breaking up with him seemed unbearable.   
 

Taking another sip of his drink, he caught sight of Chanyeol dragging his shorter boyfriend towards him, eyes glassy and a dopey grin on his face. 

"Pikadae!" the giant threw himself into Jongdae's arms, hooking an arm around his neck, "You made it!"

"Hey Chan. Nice party."

"Then why don't you look like having fun?" Baek piped in with a small pout. He was just as drunk as his boyfriend, voice higher than necessary above the loud music. 

Jongdae looked down at his bottle, thinking that really, he should at least attempt to look like he was having fun. 

"This is not really how I pictured my Christmas night," he replied with a small sigh. 

"And Joon? Did you fight or something?" Baekhyun asked as he reached for another drink, passing one to his boyfriend. Jongdae nodded curtly, "What about?"

"Oh oh! Did you fight about who was taller again?" Chanyeol questioned seriously, face breaking into a grin a moment later. And then the couple was doubling over with laughter in front of a clearly unamused Jongdae. They'd fought about it just once, and it had been weeks ago, so shut up. 

He waited for them to come down from their high, hiccuping as they seemed to remember the conversation going on. 

"But seriously," Baekhyun tried to reason in his drunken haze, wiping away a tear, "You can't fight! You two are like... Like perfect. You are his Pikachu and he's your... your.... Yeollie!" He called, hitting his boyfriend's chest to gain his attention, "What's that thing? In that show? With the... With the..." He made swishing sounds and motioned  with his hands. 

"Poke... Pokeball?"

"Yes! He's your pokeball!" Baek exclaimed before turning back to his boyfriend, a sappy look on his face, "Thanks Yeollie," he mumbled as he hugged the taller one, "You always understand me!" he sobbed into his chest. 

"That's because I love you," Chanyeol cut in, bringing the shorter boy closer for a kiss.

Jongdae states dumbfounded at the sudden drama taking place right in front of him. He'd seen his friends drunk before, but they must've reached a whole new level of drunkness if they were already getting lovely-dovey in public. 

"Guys. Guys!" He coughed loudly, forcing the couple apart. Baekhyun seemed to be back to his usual self, but that was not Chanyeol's case, who looked dazzled and even happier than normal.

"Where were we? Oh right. Joon," Baek made a dismissive gesture, "I'm sure you'll work whatever's going on out."

"And after that you can have makeup sex!" Chanyeol interrupted, eliciting another fit of giggles between them. Jongdae dissimulated the blush spreading through his cheeks. Oh god. If only they knew they'd never even gotten to first base. He'd never live it down. 

Jongdae was seriously considering just leaving them there when a thought occurred him. 

"How are you even this drunk?" He questioned, effectively cutting the fit that had gotten over them and receiving two creepily coordinated questioning looks, "I mean. It's what, not even eleven? How are you planning on staying up till midnight?"

Silence. 

"Baek," Chanyeol turned to the shorter boy, tugging on his sleeve, "Baek, he's right! What if I fall asleep in the middle of the party?!" he asked, eyes round in deep concern. It was kind of endearing. 

"Then I'll wake you up! Like the Sleeping Beauty and the Prince, remember?" His boyfriend answered with a shy smile. 

"Right! You're right," the taller boy visibly relaxed, comically draping over Baekhyun, "You are so perfect! And you know everything! I love you." he said quietly as Baek turned to face him again. 

Jongdae took that as his queue to leave, all that romance thing they had going on reminding him of his pathetic night. He made his way to the backyard, now mostly deserted due to the cold weather, and sat on one of the benches there. His phone vibrated in his pocket for the first time in what seemed like hours. 

 

**From:** Kawaii Joonmyeonnie~!!

Jongdae! Please tell me you didn't kiss anyone else. 

 

Jongdae gaped at the screen, unsure of weather he should reply or not. 

 

**From:** Kawaii Joonmyeonnie~!!

KIM JONGDAE TELL ME YOU DIDN'T KISS ANYONE ELSE!!!

 

**From:** Kawaii Joonmyeonnie~!!

WHY AREN'T YOU REPLYING?

 

**From:** Kawaii Joonmyeonnie~!!

NVM. On my way to Chanyeol's. Wait for me. We need to talk. 

 

**From:** Kawaii Joonmyeonnie~!!

Where are you? I HOPE YOU HAVEN'T KISSED ANYONE.

 

No no no no no. Jongdae jumped to his feet. He had to get out of here! He couldn't deal with Joonmyeon, he couldn't. At least not now. 

 

  
"Jongdae!"

Too late. 

 

He turned in time to see Joonmyeon enter the yard, breathing heavily as he rushed to face him. 

"Kim Jongdae why won't you fucking answer me?!" 

"Joon? Wha-?" 

"Just," he wheezed, hands resting in his knees, "Please. Please tell me," he lowered his voice, almost a mumble, and stared up at Jongdae, "Have you? Have you kissed anyone else?"

Jongdae looked back at him in awe, taking in his unusually disheveled state, catching the exact moment his eyes turned pleading, hope fading. It was so important to him. Jongdae wanted to kick himself for not realizing it earlier. He shook his head rapidly, determination melting when Joonmyeon sank to his knees, sagging with relief. 

"No Joon. I haven't," he took a step closer to him, shifting until he was kneeled in front of him, staring right into his eyes, "Did you run all the way here just because of this? We could've talked about it in the morning, you know." 

"You weren't answering my calls and I was worried! Besides," he took a deep breath, "I... I was afraid you were being serious about what you said earlier."

"I wasn't. I wouldn't do that to you. You know that," Jongdae fought the urge to lace his fingers through his boyfriend's damp hair, "I was just... angry. Still am. But still, you didn't have to come."

"I came for you," Joonmyeon said, springing to his feet and taking Jongdae's hand in his. And it was heaven. For the first time in the history _Joonmyeon_ had been the one to initiate _physical contact_. It was almost too good to be true.  
Jongdae was yanked up and out of the yard, distantly hearing a "TOLD YOU ABOUT MAKE UP SEX!" and something that sounded a lot like "BE SAFE!" followed by an attempt at catcalling. Jongdae hated his friends. He really did. But he'd worry about killing them some other time. Like maybe when Joonmyeon wasn't holding his hand. Or whatever. 

  
Joon barely slowed down their pace once they were out in the night, and he hadn't uttered a word in several blocks. Jongdae didn't like not hearing his voice.    


"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

"But I want to know now!" He whined childishly, "Besides I'm still mad at you," he took his hand off the boy's grip, regretting his decision as soon as he made it. He'd barely gotten to the point of having his hand taken and now he was going to ruin it! Idiot. Good thing that Joonmyeon was used to deal with his stubborn self, gently taking his hand back and pulling him from where he'd stopped walking. 

"Come on. We're almost there," he said with a soft smile. Cheater. He knew that Jongdae would follow him wherever for that smile. 

Joonmyeon halted his pace once they arrived to a dimly lit street, pretty ordinary, and Jongdae bumped against his back. Joonmyeon turned to look at him, a hint of nervousness in his smile as he tugged him until he was just under the light of a streetlight. 

"Do... Do you wanna know why? Why won't I kiss you?"

Jongdae felt his uneasiness climb back to him, suddenly a lot colder than before, "Yeah. I mean. I guess?"

Joon let out a huff of air, shooting a reassuring smile his way. 

"Okay. Well. To begin with, let's just say that me being almost two years older than you still bugs me sometimes. I'm scared that you'll feel that I'm forcing you into something you are not ready. Or something that I think that you're not ready for. I worry about doing something that'll finally turn you away all the time," Jongdae opened his mouth to dismiss everything he was saying, but was stopped with a light squeeze in his hand, "Hold on, there's more. I... I really like you, Jongdae. Like, a lot. I've had some relationships before that were ruined because we wanted too much too soon.  I can't risk something like that happening to us. You're... You're so perfect I'm constantly afraid of messing this up. I don't want to look back and wish I'd done things differently. For me, something as little as holding hands or... or kissing is a big deal, a gesture of how I really want to be with you. I'm so sorry. The last thing I intended was for you to feel unwanted. I want you to be as happy as I am with you," taking a deep breath, he pointed upwards, a brilliant smile gracing his features.  
Jongdae, mind still reeling because of the sudden and so heartwarming confession, followed Joonmyeon's hand, blinking at the little plant tied on top of the streetlight. 

What? He blinked again, eyes adjusting to the light. Could that be... Mistletoe? A soft tug on his hand brought him back to his boyfriend, heart beating against his ribs when his other hand came to cup his face. His surprised gasped was cut short by a warm pair of lips on his. At last. His brain was apparently having a hard time catching up with everything, but when it did he lost no time in closing his eyes, melting completely into Joonmyeon. 

It started out slow. A caress. Warm lips against slightly colder ones, brushing, applying soft pressure. Jongdae felt himself smile against the kiss, heart skipping a beat when he felt Joonmyeon do the same. Joonmyeon's hand untangled from his, coming up to rest on his hip, bringing their bodies closer together. Joonmyeon traced the outline of his lips softly, eliciting a small whimper from the younger's throat. He was ashamed to admit how many times he'd fantasized about kissing Joonmyeon, tasting his lips, feeling his heat. But not once he could've imagined his boyfriend was a good kissed. Well, more than good, actually. Closer to 'omg you're so perfect I want to kiss you forever please marry me and then let's make out some more' kind of good. It completely threw his theory of Joonmyeon doubting his kissing skills  as a reason not to kiss him out of the window. Not that he cared, though. He became dizzy, Joonmyeon's tongue lacing with his as Jongdae's fingers finally thread though his silky hair, tugging him forward until all he could feel was Joonmyeon Joonmyeon Joonmyeon. And it was perfect. 

His lungs where screaming at him for air when he grudgingly broke the kiss. Eyes locked with Joonmyeon's, he took ragged breaths for a moment, before Joonmyeon broke into a breathtaking grin, lips reddened and puffy, hair tussled where Jongdae's hands where still running through it. And his eyes. Joonmyeon's eyes displayed so much _love_. Those where the same eyes that chided him into paying attention to his schoolwork, the ones that welcomed him every time they met. The ones that had finally, after all those months of pinning, had accepted to got out with him. The ones that he'd seen when he'd tentatively offered to spend that Christmas with him. The ones that told Jongdae that Joonmyeon loved him such as much as he loved him back. 

"First kiss under de mistletoe. Did you... Like it?" 

Like it? Jongdae was in cloud nine. He absentmindedly nodded, eyes catching sight of the mistletoe again. Had Joonmyeon really took the trouble to put it up there just to kiss him? It sounded like something he'd do. Blinking to gain some sort of clarity of thoughts, he looked back at his boyfriend, feeling himself beam excitedly. 

"Can we do it again?!" he exclaimed, startling the elder into a silent laugher, a really short one, as Jongdae was quick to seal their lips together. He took Joonmyeon's lower lip between his, nipping at it lightly before leaning further into him and trailing they boy's perfectly aligned teeth with his tongue. Soon he was feeling every inch of Joonmyeon's mouth against him, perfectly content but needing so much _more_. His hands roamed though Joonmyeon's chest, not caring in the slightest that they were in a really public place, feeling his lean muscles even through several layers of clothes. Grabbing him by the nape, he deepened the kiss until it was Joonmyeon who was braking apart for air, looking so utterly _debauched_ that Jongdae fought the urge to ravish him right there, saving the moment into the side of his brain completely devoted to him. 

  
"Come on. Let's go home and wait 'till midnight," Joonmyeon suggested, voice low and rugged and _perfect_ , bringing a hand up to brush against Jongdae's lower lip. It really didn't take much convincing.  
 

When the clock struck twelve, the fireworks found Jongdae straddling Joonmyeon, legs wrapped firmly around the elder's waist, kissing him furiously, making up for the lost time. The sudden burst of colors and explosions through the windows drew them apart. They welcomed Christmas with another kiss before belatedly remembering they had still way too many cookies and -now cold- hot chocolate they could eat between kisses until the sun was up. 

"Hey Joon?" Jongdae asked hours later, comfortably draped on the legs of a sleepy Joonmyeon, quietly munching on a cookie. 

"Hmn?" 

"Are we gonna wait four years to fuck or what?"

Joonmyeon choked on his own cookie, coughing several times as Jongdae calmly patted his back. 

"What?!"

"You know. Since we do everything slow," Jongdae shrugged before smiling mischievously, "Maybe this time I should be the one tying a mistletoe above the bed" 

 


End file.
